Granted, but your teacher gets fired.

I wish that Six Flags Great America would be open year round.

granted, but the coasters freeze during the winter and no one can ever ride them again

I wish I was a bird so I could fly

Granted, but while you're on the ground catching worms a cat eats you.

I wish my dog wouldn't stare at me while I eat.

Granted, but he loves you and jumps on you so you can pet him.

I wish I had something to wish for.

Granted, you win Round 200 of Build-It.

I wish North Korea would stop bluffing and show their "power".

Granted, the spread of communism takes over the world.

I wish for unlimited ice cream

Denied
I wish for 100 more twitch followers by Thursday at 9:20am ET

^ Granted, however they are all bots.

I wish that I didn't have all these mosquito bites.

^ too bad, you've already got malaria. You'll be dead in days so you won't have to worry. Then as you're lying in the ground, all those animals, insects, and maggots will infestate your body and eat you until you are nothing


I wish for my pez dispenser to always be full.

^Granted but it breaks and then you walk out into the rain and scream "NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

I wish that Justin Bieber and his piece of crap music would go to Jupiter to get more Stupider.